Friday, February 24, 2012

Did I fail My Child.........Question of the Day Fri ~ Sat ~ Sunday......

Mr. Anatomy, 
Without too much detail, I would like your opinion on my son's sexuality. My son went to a program where it was supposed to help at risk boys with their behavior prior to entering manhood. Well, I recently found out he was sodomized with a broom handle while taking a shower by a group of boys. My son is now confused about his sexuality. I am beginning to feel like a failure if my son is gay. I don't know why but in my mind it is OK for a girl to be with a girl, but not a guy with a guy. Maybe that can be a question of the day......(Our Question of the Day is)......
Why is it I feel that way and do others feel as I do about men vs women in same sex situations?

For me, it's not too often I know my subjects, but in this case, I have watched this child grow into adult hood. This tells me this could have happened to anyone, so I will advise in a very delicate fashion as I proceed. Dive in Bloggers and share your knowledge. 

Hurchel Williams, MBA
Life Coach, Motivational Relationship Speaker,
Author, Anatomy of a Cheater 
Williamshjr@anatomyofacheater.com  (email US)
http://twitter.com/anatomyofacheat       (follow US)

7 comments:

  1. This question hits home for me because I have known this child since he was about 5. Which tells me this could have been any of our kids. Please, be aware of what's going on around you. I will offer my opinion much later about the situation.

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  2. Mr. Anatomy....I one of your facebook friends a I read everything you posted. I dont speak like other people so I just read your stuff and dont never have nothing to say but If somebody dont like what you got to say let them find another hobby. dont stop doing what you are doing because one person say negative stuff. Ok? Now, to the lady with the boy with the problem.
    Hey lady, you are not a failure, because we can;t help what do happen to our children. All we can do is love them unconditional and hope they learn along the way. Im older and now a grandmomma and I worry about so many things out here. If he turns out to like men folk, just love him and show him how to be good to whomever he is with.

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  3. Twin - Matthew,
    Lady, life is about traumatic experiences. I have now been on both sides of the aisle and I've learned it's all about love and comfort. Don't beat your son up for being whoever he becomes. If you do, you will lose him. The only way to fight his confusion of sexuality is to listen and be supportive. How old is your son? Be there for him, don't run him away with the way YOU feel he should be!
    Twin

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  4. this will not answer your question, but you are not a "failure" if your child is gay! The only way you could be a "failure" with your child is if they dont feel your love or acceptance. Love is where it is at! NOT sexual preference!! Unconditional love.

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  5. Dear Distraught Mother,

    No, you did not fail your child. Traumatic experiences tend to affect ones psychic in ways that cannot be explained. Do not assume the guilt nor responsibility for what happened to your son. There was no way that you could have known that this was going to happen. The only responsibility that you have now is to love him unconditionally and if he desires to seek counseling then seek the best that you can find. There is a group called Exodus International that ministers to homosexuals desiring to get out of that lifestyle. Search the web and maybe you can find a chapter or an affiliated group in your area.

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  6. Cindy,
    I commend you for always finding ways to help your fellow individuals through stressful situations. You are a wealth of information. This community appreciates your concerted effort.
    H. Williams, MBA

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  7. Thank you Mr. Williams,

    I greatly appreciate your encouraging words and vote of confidence!! Thank you for the platform for all to give their own opinions and views without judgement!!

    Sincerely,

    CindyLou

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