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Mr. Anatomy,I just finished reading your book, and I must say, I thought your book would be about glorifying cheating, but I have to report, it was more of a "Self-Help" for me. You gave me secrets to unlocking my own insecurities. I am a hard working woman. I have a career, and I try my best to do what's right. My problem, I am VERY insecure in my relationship and I worry when I clearly don't have to. My boyfriend doesn't know it, but I follow him when I think he is lying and I drive past his job just to make sure his car is there. I have made a key to his house and go by there periodically to see if there is anything incriminating laying around. What have I become, I am acting like a stalker! My Question is ......
"When you are sneaking around through your boyfriend's things and you find something questionable, what do you do? Can you question him about it?"
Ma'am, I truly thank you for your understanding of the true reason Anatomy of a Cheater was written but you have quite the issue with your insecurities. Before I chime in, I would like to give the bloggers the opportunity to do so. From this point forward, I will address you as Ms. Jealousy. Please remain available to answer any questions my bloggers may have.
Hurchel Williams, MBA
Life Coach, Motivational Relationship Speaker
Author, Anatomy of a Cheater
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More than likely there has been a traumatic relationship in your past that leads you to your present actions, whether it be one of your own relationships or someone in your close family or friends.
ReplyDeleteIf your bf hasn't given you a reason or done anything to make you distrust him my advice would be for you to seek a counselor to help find the underlying problem that may be causing you to feel the way you do and your actions.
You need to seek some professional help and sit yo ass down somewhere!!! Why are you in a relationship with ANYBODY with all these insecurities and self esteem issues??? You gon mess around and either get hurt or get a damn burglary charge
ReplyDelete!!! You don't love or trust yourself and you dead wrong for bringing this man or any man into your den of insanity!!! Stop breaking in his house (cause thats wat u doin) and get yoself some help before he find out you a stalker!!!! And you have no room to confront him about anything you find cause jus like in court you obtained it illegally!!!!!!
Hello Ms. Jealously,
ReplyDeleteI have to agree with Mandy and Sherita in that you need to get some professional counseling. There is obviously something in your past that is creating this behavior to manifest its ugly self. A person's behavior always stems from experiences that they have encountered along life's journey. Seek counsel to find the root of this massive tree that has grown so that you can pull it up and get rid of it. Freedom will come once you deal with this past wound to get the healing you so need and deserve. Blessings on your path to wholeness.
Mr. Anatomy,
ReplyDeleteI am Ms. Jealousy and I haven't gotten your word yet. I do agree with the 3 answers I did get that something must be done and I have literally sought help but I need a word from you to complete this journey. I wrote a review (jazzmin0) on Barnes and Noble because I really love what you do here and your book is just amazing. I anxiously await your word before trying to seek some kind of therapy. I see that you are a life coach. Do you think that is a service that could help me through my own personal trauma? My boyfriend is a good guy, there is just something wrong with me because I've been cheated on, and my father cheated on my mom. Is there someway for me to expect more, or will I always be troubled from my past?
Dear Ms. Jealousy,
ReplyDeleteAs I alluded to in the first chapter of my book, you cannot paint everyone with the same brush. You can't make your new man, pay for the mistakes of your other, less productive relationships. I will be the first to admit, men can really seek to lower your self esteem, and the way we feel about ourselves. In my teachings, I try to prepare women to expect the "Expected!" If you start a relationship, and it goes sour, then, tell yourself, it's not my issue, or loss, it's his. You have to have strong will power to navigate relationships of the 21st century. These relationships take trust and work from both parties. If you continue on the path that you are going, you will self destruct and bring the relationship down with you. You will NEVER have a fruitful union until you first learn to trust and believe in the guy you are with. NOW, with that said, stop worrying about things you can't control. My advice, be the BEST YOU you know how to be. If a problem arises, deal with it then, but don't seek out the problem, let it find you. As for what you have found while you were snooping; let it go! In most snooping incidents, what you find can be explained with logical thought and patience. However, if you approach him with your findings, and they prove to be insignificant, you have now shown your insecurity by being in his house without approval. I sure hope this helps.
Mr. Anatomy = Hurchel Williams, MBA
I am late responding on this blog and I apologize. I could not believe what I was reading. This literally pissed me off. Please get some help....and soon. You really should break it off with your man while you get help. No one's privacy and personal space should be violated EVER. It is women like yourself, that damage good men and leave so much residue behind that the next woman has to climb over all of that mess just to gain his trust. Right now you are not any good to anyone and you definitely not any good to the realationship. You have just allowed your inner demons to run you off the cliff. I hope you get help because the next man that crosses your path may walk into a kitchen with a boiled family pet cooking
Delete