Monday, July 23, 2012

"What is NOT being Said?" .....Our Question of the Day ??

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Mr. Anatomy, 
I've been dating my boyfriend for about 3 months now and while it hasn't gotten totally serious, in my heart, I feel it's heading that way. He is saying all the right things and has been a complete gentleman along the way. Since I just moved to the Jacksonville, FL area from Texas, I truly can't verify anything about him or his past. We met at work, and I can't help but wonder why everyone has told me to be careful with this relationship without elaborating. We work for the same company, but in different departments. He talks about his last girlfriend as if she ruined his life and he totally hates her. My question is.....
"When a man talks negatively about their last girlfriend or "fiance'" what does that say about him?" 

Ms. "Inquisitive" as I will refer to you from this point forward, you have a real question that deserves an answer. Often times men can give you a peek into who they are just by speaking about their past. Before I render judgement, I will give my bloggers the opportunity to chime in first. Please remain available for any questions my bloggers may have. 

Hurchel Williams, MBA
Life Coach, Motivational Relationship Speaker
Author, Anatomy of a Cheater 
Williamshjr@anatomyofacheater.com (send US your Questions anonymously) 
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Tuesday, July 17, 2012

UPDATE To "If Leaving YOU is Wrong what's Right," Jun 28, 2012

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Many people have asked about the outcome from 28 Jun 2012. So I reached out via email to the lady in the blog, and I was given the following information:
Mr. Anatomy, 
I picked my (ex) husband up from (Not Gonna Say it) prison and started to drive home. He had requested we get a room close to the prison, but I declined citing our son would be with me. When he was released, the conversation quickly went to how much he missed touching me, and how he wanted to immediately get to having another child. Like you requested, Mr. Anatomy, I waited until we were half way home to initiate the conversation about us not being together anymore. Although I told him we weren't married anymore, he first acted as if he didn't hear me because he said it was impossible to get a divorce without him signing it. Because I didn't want to rub it in his face, I took the high road, and continued to confess my love, but how I just wasn't "in love" with him anymore!  After finally acknowledging what I said, he asked me if there was someone else. I told him yes, but that wasn't the reason I got the divorce. I told him it was because I was lonely and afraid about the future. He screamed and yelled the whole way to the halfway house. My original plan was to take him to the house and show him how I maintained it in his absence, but after all the screaming, I turned him in a whole 6 hours early. He slammed the door and broke the window to my car. He wants to know who the other man is I am now seeing. My Question this now is........


"Under the circumstances, was there any other way to say to him, what needed to be said? I feel so bad, but do I have to tell him who the other guy is? He knows the church and the minister and I don't want there to be any trouble!"


Sorry to see your car window in shambles, but think about it, it could have been worst. Based on what you have shared, I think things went rather smooth. I have some questions about your future, but lets first allow our bloggers to chime in on your ongoing saga. Please remain available for any questions my bloggers may have. 


Hurchel Williams, MBA
Life Coach, Motivational Relationship Speaker
Author, Anatomy of a Cheater 
Williamshjr@anatomyofacheater.com (send US your Questions anonymously) 
www.cafepress.com/anatomyofacheater (purchase OUR merchandise)
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Friday, July 13, 2012

"Who ARE You" .....Our Weekend Mind Puzzler for the Day

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Mr. Anatomy,
I have a really quick question that holds true for so many. While looking in the eyes of my significant other, I saw her dedication to make me feel better in so many ways. I saw her passion to hold me and protect me in ways others haven't. I saw the true desire for someone to love another more than they love thyself. Whether intimacy, friendly joking, or simply comforting me through touch; Come on People, let's talk about if you have ever had that someone. My question to her was ..........
"Who Are You?" Am I dreaming, or is this just a season and maybe this type of admiration will change? Tell me Mr. Anatomy, is this real? 


Sir, I will pose this question to the masses on my blog. In life, we do find someone we are compatible with, but well, let's just hold off on that response until my bloggers have spoken. I like what you have started Mr. Sensitive! Let's have fun with this one! 
Hurchel Williams, MBA
Life Coach, Motivational Relationship Speaker
Author, Anatomy of a Cheater 
Williamshjr@anatomyofacheater.com (send US your Questions anonymously) 
www.cafepress.com/anatomyofacheater (purchase OUR merchandise)
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Tuesday, July 10, 2012

"Why Does He get angry and Hit Me?" .... Question of the Day

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Mr. Anatomy,
I am not sure if you keep information on your attendees, but on March 19 of 2011, I attended your seminar for professors and college chairs at (not gonna say it) University. Your seminar was on infidelity, sex and relationships. During that seminar, you spoke about abusive relationships and how they can be closely related to the inadequacies of a man to please his mate. You said their is an association between a woman's high sex drive and the anger of the man who can't please her. At that time, my relationship was still fresh and new, but here lately, something has happened to make me reach out to you, and ask that you expound on what you were saying. I'm Asian and I spent a few minutes after the seminar speaking to you about my husband's lack of association with sex and pleasure. My new husband seems to want to get upset with me when I don't react the way he feels I should during intercourse. My Question is ......


"Is there something I can do to keep my new husband calm and give him the control he needs in bed?" 
I do remember you and your name. I keep notes and even the questions I'm asked and who ask them. I use the questions later for follow up research. I am so happy you have found your way to our blog site, just sorry you found us on these circumstances. I will refer to you from hence forward as Ms. "Professor." I will expound on my thoughts but only after my bloggers have a chance to chime in. Please remain available for the next few days to answer any questions our bloggers may have of you. 

Hurchel Williams, MBA
Life Coach, Motivational Relationship Speaker
Author, Anatomy of a Cheater 
Williamshjr@anatomyofacheater.com (send US your Questions anonymously) 
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Sunday, July 8, 2012

"Momma's Baby....Papa; hmmm, Maybe?" Our Question of the Day!

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Mr. Anatomy, 
I have a dilemma that will probably threaten the security of my marriage. Life has a way of coming back to haunt you when you least expect it to. I'm in the U.S. Army and about 11 years ago, I was stationed in Germany with my husband of 2 years at that time. My husband was deployed for about 6 months training with a joint services unit. Well, in his absence, I strayed just a bit and had an affair with a fellow soldier. There truly wasn't much to the relationship, we were just casual friends that had a few too many drinks one evening and sex started and didn't stop until days before my husband returned. Since then, I have been faithful and asked God to forgive my past transgressions. Our life has been nothing short of perfect. Problem is, I have a ten year old son, and I now live in Ft. (not gonna say it) GA. The friend that I screwed around with has resurfaced and is requesting a paternity test to prove my son is not his child! I conceived my son around the time my husband returned, or maybe days before! :(  My Question is .................

"How on earth do I tell my husband about this request when he knew nothing of the relationship? Do I try to hide it, and pray my son is not the other man's son, or do I come clean, right NOW?"


Ma'am, I must say, you have quite the quandary. For this question, I must take a step back and review the facts much closer. In the meantime, I will address you as Ms. "Paternity" from hence forward, and allow our bloggers to open this discussion as usual. Please remain available to answer any questions my bloggers may have of you. 

Hurchel Williams, MBA
Life Coach, Motivational Relationship Speaker
Author, Anatomy of a Cheater 
Williamshjr@anatomyofacheater.com (send US your Questions anonymously) 
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Monday, July 2, 2012

"Update .... Temptation is Testing Me" - From January 30, 2012

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Mr. Anatomy,     http://theanatomyofacheater.blogspot.com/2012/01/mr.html#comment-form
(Please Use Link Above to Access Original Question)
Do you Remember me, "Tempted and Willing?" I was your blog question on January 30, 2012. I was just a lonely woman at home who wasn't getting her fill of what she needed, so I toyed around with the "Young Gun" from the mail room! Well, it's June now and a lot has changed. My husband and I are divorced. I got the house, my car, and half of most of our possessions. It was a reasonable split and it didn't get nasty. My husband had a secret life that was revealed in court and me and my youngster turned up the heat a bit. I have also been promoted to Vice President and I pulled "Young Gun" out of the mail room as he is now a "Young Executive" and doing well. I've asked him to move in several times, but his answer is the same, "Your husband is the (not gonna say it) and that is still scary for me!" My Question is.....

"Can a woman Propose Marriage to a guy?" It is the 21st Century and I think "Young Gun" is a bit intimidated by my success and power; not to mention, feeling compared to my former husband! 


Ms. Tempted and Willing, I remember you, oh boy do I remember you! I don't know whether to congratulate you or just hold my breath for the rest of the ride. Happiness comes in many different forms and you seem to have found what best suits you. I will allow my bloggers to address you first, then I will render my opinion. As always, stay available for any questions that may arise. 



Hurchel Williams, MBA
Life Coach, Motivational Relationship Speaker
Author, Anatomy of a Cheater 
Williamshjr@anatomyofacheater.com (send US your Questions anonymously) 
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Thursday, June 28, 2012

"If Leaving YOU is Wrong what's Right,"...Our Question of the Day!!

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Mr. Anatomy, 
I have a dilemma and after reading some of your past post, I am almost certain you and your bloggers can help me understand the direction I should take. I am dating one of the Ministers from my church and things have gotten pretty serious. He was there for me when my husband received a Federal charge about 8 years ago and had to go away. My husband took a charge for our family owned daycare, and didn't take me or my sisters through the process. He decided the "buck" would stop with him. I have been visiting him twice a month since he's been gone. What he doesn't know is I have divorced him because I didn't think it was right to date and still be a married woman. The Minister and I are madly in love, but I don't want to be seen as a wife that lost love for her husband, but 7 years has passed and I just don't have that love I once did. I have been struggling with how to tell him this for the past 2 years, but I can't procrastinate any longer. I pick him up next Thursday to take him to our local halfway house. My Question is .......


"How do I tell my ex-husband I have moved on and don't want to be married to him any longer? He and I will always be friends and share our son who is now 10." 


Ma'am, first and foremost, thanks for bringing your question to our Forum. Now, while I never judge and always keep my answers above board, I have to prepare you for the direction my bloggers my take.  They are a pretty vocal bunch and things tend to get opinionated. With that said, I will address you as Ms. "Confused" from hence forward. Please remain available to answer any questions my bloggers may have. 



Hurchel Williams, MBA
Life Coach, Motivational Relationship Speaker
Author, Anatomy of a Cheater 
Williamshjr@anatomyofacheater.com (send US your Questions anonymously) 
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Tuesday, June 26, 2012

"The KIDS and Baby Moma OR Me!" Our Question of the Day

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Mr. Anatomy, 
I need your help, and in the worst way. I have accepted my boyfriend's proposal for marriage and that is supposed to be a good thing, but I have one slight problem; that damn baby-moma and those bad ass kids! When we were dating I just tolerated the kids and the constant calls from the "Dragon-EX" but now, since he has asked for my hand in marriage, I am seriously having second thoughts. Everything his kids do, he thinks it's funny, and I am annoyed! His son (6) put ants in my car, under my mat and as I was driving I was being bit. His daughter (8) poured all of my shampoo out of my bottle and replaced it with Liquid Tide for washing clothes. The "Dragon-EX" lives around the corner and it seems every time I am visiting, the kids just kinda show up with her knocking at the damn door! I feel Like I'm hangin out with the Boondock's kids, Riley and Huey! My Question is.........

"How do I handle this unfortunate situation? I think I "hate" his kids and he won't take my feelings serious. He is laughing with them, but the sh*t ain't funny!"

Ma'am, first and foremost, let me thank you for bringing your situation to our forum. While unique to you, I can assure you, you are not alone in your quest to break your man away from his past. From hence forward, I will address you as Ms. "Tortured" and try to find a solution to your problem. First, let's see what our bloggers have to say, then I will give you my opinion. Please stay available for any questions my bloggers may have of you. 


Hurchel Williams, MBA
Life Coach, Motivational Relationship Speaker
Author, Anatomy of a Cheater 
Williamshjr@anatomyofacheater.com (send US your Questions anonymously) 
www.cafepress.com/anatomyofacheater (purchase OUR merchandise)
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Friday, June 22, 2012

Will My "HOUSE be a HOME?" Our Blog Question of the Weekend !

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Mr. Anatomy, 


I know you have probably answered this question 1000 times but I want to relate it to my unique situation. My boyfriend and I have been dating for 6 years and on Monday we close on our house and become permanent residents together. My mom is livid and is telling me NOT to move in with him unless he puts a ring on my finger. I feel by moving in with him, he will marry me and it's really not that big of a deal because we are in love. I'm 27 and my boyfriend is 42. He had a nasty divorce so he is very touchy about marriage and I understand. My Question is....

Is there any reason I shouldn't move ahead with the plans we have for the rest of our lives? 


I have answered this question before, but not here in this forum, I have tackled it live in my seminars and counseling sessions. So, actually, I look forward to hearing the feedback of my bloggers prior to answering the question myself. From hence forward, I will address you as Ms. Understanding! Please remain available for any questions our bloggers my have for you. 



Hurchel Williams, MBA
Life Coach, Motivational Relationship Speaker
Author, Anatomy of a Cheater 
Williamshjr@anatomyofacheater.com (send US your Questions anonymously) 
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Thursday, June 21, 2012

THE "FLOAT ON" ANATOMY BOOK LAUNCH CRUISE

Please visit www.anatomyofacheater.com, click on the " CRUISE " tab.
Download and print your form and email it to the email address provided!! See you soon!!!!!

Monday, June 18, 2012

"To Lie or NOT to Lie" That is the Question ..... of the Day!!

Mr. Anatomy works with underprivileged individuals who can't always afford his Life Coaching services. No real need is EVER turned away. Here's How You can Help: Send a discrete donation to help keep this option available to everyone. Visit us @www.anatomyofacheater.com
To Comment on today's Question, Simply click on the word "Comments" below next to the number of comments and then, type in the white box!
Mr. Anatomy,
I have a slight problem that I sure hope you are able to help me with. My husband is 11 years older than me and our sex life has taken a turn towards boredom. I still love and adore him because he gives me so much more than just physical attention, but sometimes my body is left lacking what it needs to complete a intimacy session. It is so routine, the other night, I fell asleep during the act. I purchased a toy to assist with my problem on my own time. My husband is adamantly against the use of toys so when he found it still in the package in my hiding spot, I told him I had purchased it as a gag gift for a friend at work. My question is:


"How do I reverse the lie I told to my husband and make him understand why I need assistance to feel like a woman should?"


As always, we appreciate you bringing your issue to our forum. From hence forward, we will address you as Ms. Unsatisfied. While I have an opinion, I will allow our bloggers to speak first and offer their opinions before I express my feelings toward your situation. Please remain available for any question our bloggers may have for you. 


Hurchel Williams, MBA

Life Coach, Motivational Relationship Speaker
Author, Anatomy of a Cheater 
Williamshjr@anatomyofacheater.com (send US your Questions anonymously) 
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Friday, June 15, 2012

Simple Question for the Weekend ....... Why do Men and Women Cheat?

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Since I am asked this question on a regular basis....... let's explore it as a group and as a forum! Not here to judge, just Explore!! 


"Why do "PEOPLE" cheat on each other while in a relationship? If you have every cheated, tell us Why?" 



Hurchel Williams, MBA
Life Coach, Motivational Relationship Speaker
Author, Anatomy of a Cheater 
Williamshjr@anatomyofacheater.com (send US your Questions anonymously) 
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Thursday, June 14, 2012

If the "Franchise" of Anatomy of a Cheater took a Cruise, are you In?

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Hurchel Williams, MBA
Life Coach, Motivational Relationship Speaker

Author, Anatomy of a Cheater 
Williamshjr@anatomyofacheater.com (send US your Questions anonymously) 
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Tuesday, June 12, 2012

"Whose House......Grandma's HOUSE" * Our Question of the Day *

Mr. Anatomy works with underprivileged individuals who can't always afford his Life Coaching services. No real need is EVER turned away. Here's How You can Help: Send a discrete donation to help keep this option available to everyone. Visit us @www.anatomyofacheater.com
To Comment on today's Question, Simply click on the word "Comments" below next to the number of comments and then, type in the white box! 
Mr. Anatomy,
I saw what happened over the weekend on your blog and I thought I would resubmit my question I sent to you over a month ago. I currently live with my grandmother because she is aging and she needs assistance caring for herself around the clock. I have a boyfriend of 6 months and recently we took our relationship to another level. So far, everything is good because we were friends first. He comes over very late and typically is gone before grandma wakes up. The other night, while having "relations" with my boyfriend, we were startled by grandma standing in the doorway with the bible in her hand praying for the sinful act (as she stated) that I was performing. I have never been so embarrassed. 
My Question is .......
"How do I co-exist in the house with an aging Grandma and still have a life of my own involving intimacy?"


First and foremost, I apologize for the delay in posting your question but our success has created a very unique problem; we have more questions than days of the week. We select the best possible topic depending on the trend of our bloggers. From hence forward, I will refer to you as Ms. "Late  Night" to refer to the time period you said you spend with your man. As always, I will allow the bloggers to respond first before giving you my advice on how to co-exist with Grandma. Please remain available for any question posed by the bloggers. Enjoy ! 


Hurchel Williams, MBA
Life Coach, Motivational Relationship Speaker
Author, Anatomy of a Cheater 
Williamshjr@anatomyofacheater.com (send US your Questions anonymously) 
www.cafepress.com/anatomyofacheater (purchase OUR merchandise)
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Friday, June 8, 2012

Good Sex or Routine Touching...? Fri - Sat - Sun - Question of the Day

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Mr. Anatomy, 
I read somewhere where some of your talents include relationship counseling and sex therapy. When I saw that report and read some of the questions your followers asked, I let my guard down as a man, to find out the fundamental things that make a woman curl her toes. My girl and I have been dating for 5 years and we are committed to one another but when we make love, I can't help but feel like it's routine and we have both become complacent with trying to make it better. She and I don't talk about it but I know I have lost some of the magic from years ago. My Question is ........ 

"How do you truly know your woman is being pleased during sexual intercourse? What can I do to assure a positive sexual relationship long into the future?" 



The Franchise of Anatomy of a Cheater takes great pride in helping the masses find the best of who they are and then pull it to the forefront of who a person may become. Yes, as you have outlined, sexual therapy and counseling is one of the services that I incorporate under my umbrella. From hence forward, I will address you as Mr. "Man-Answers" and give you my full attention once our bloggers have had an opportunity to offer their opinions. Please remain available for 3 days to any question our forum may have. 


Hurchel Williams, MBA
Life Coach, Motivational Relationship Speaker

Author, Anatomy of a Cheater 
Williamshjr@anatomyofacheater.com (send US your Questions anonymously) 
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Tuesday, June 5, 2012

"Three's Company, Four is Comfort!" Tues- Wed- Thurs - Question of the Day...

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Mr. Anatomy,
Since I have been a dedicated blogger since the very beginning of your successful "blog launch" can I please move to the front of the Question line .......(smiling big)! OK.... here we go.... So my guy and I are considering a threesome. He has a female in mind but oddly enough, I would feel more comfortable if I could invite another man and make it a foursome. (No guy on guy action though!) My Question is .....
"How do I approach my guy with my new idea for our endeavor to make me more comfortable?"  
First and foremost, thank you for bringing your question to our forum. From this point forward, I will address you as Ms. "Seduction! I will surely give your question the consideration it deserves but prior to doing so, I will allow my bloggers to chime in as always. I must say, as a disclaimer, "while we don't condone all of the actions of fanz who submit questions, we do actively seek questions that are personal to each individual" for a better, well rounded understanding. Please make yourself available for any questions our forum may have of you! 


Hurchel Williams, MBA
Life Coach, Motivational Relationship Speaker

Author, Anatomy of a Cheater 
Williamshjr@anatomyofacheater.com (send US your Questions anonymously) 
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Saturday, June 2, 2012

Is LOVE Possible? The Weekend - Sat - Sun- Mon - Question of the Day

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Mr. Anatomy, 
I have fallen for someone that should be totally off limits and I don't know how to proceed from here. My co-worker and I have been acquaintances for about 2 months and just because I am close to her, I have figured out a lot about her life. She has several men she's active with besides the one she calls her man. She is abusive to her boyfriend and treats him like he's completely a non factor. I've began to spend  time with them in groups of people and sometimes even as a third wheel for drinks. He is very intellectual and I have grown very fond of him. He and I talk when she leaves to text others or take private phone calls but we haven't crossed the line. I think we have a mutual respect for one another and communicate with our eyes when we are not talking to one another. My Question is ......
"Is there any proper way to approach my co-worker and ask her if I can pursue something with the man she treats like crap? I know it's not right, and I've never done anything like this, but I enjoy the energy we share! Help Mr. Anatomy!!!"

Honestly, anything is possible, but before I give you my opinion, lets do this. First, I will address you as Ms. "Secret" from hence forward, secondly, I will allow my bloggers to give you their opinion before I render mine. Last, please make yourself available for the next 3 days to answer any question my bloggers may have. Let the fun begin. 


Hurchel Williams, MBA
Life Coach, Motivational Relationship Speaker
Author, Anatomy of a Cheater 
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Wednesday, May 30, 2012

Sex with "NO" Protection ....... Wed - Thurs - Fri - Question of the Day ...

To Comment on today's Question, Simply click on the word "Comments" below next to the number of comments and then, type in the white box!
Mr. Anatomy,
 I've been in a relationship with a man I work with for about 7 months. At first we were friends and then, the company took us on a retreat and, well, the rest is history. This man is truly secretive and doesn't openly share who he is. He just kinda comes and go into my life at his own leisure, but spends more nights with me, than he spends at his own place. He recently gave me the "girlfriend" tag and now introduces me as his woman when we are in the company of others. I don't rock the boat because, to be honest, I am just happy having him by my side. You see, I'm a big girl and he is a small fit individual, who I truly don't want to part with. He says I am the first girl with size he's ever been with and its a different "ride" as he puts it. The other night, while having sex, he removed his condom and inserted himself in me raw without discussing it first. That was the first time we have EVER been intimate without protection, which actually concerned me a bit. My question is .......
"How long do you date a man before sex should go to the "No Condom" level? When a man removes his condom, does that say something about the future of the relationship?"
First and foremost, thank you for bringing your unique question to our forum. I selected your question out of the many I receive because I truly think this is a topic many women secretly ponder within themselves. From hence forward, I will address you as Ms. "Voluptuous" and allow my bloggers to give you insight into the question you have posed. I will chime in a bit later once everyone else has had the opportunity. Please remain available for any questions our bloggers may have. 

Hurchel Williams, MBA
Life Coach, Motivational Relationship Speaker
Author, Anatomy of a Cheater 
Williamshjr@anatomyofacheater.com (send US your Questions anonymously) 
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Friday, May 25, 2012

"Interracial Dating" Where do I fit in? Fri - Sat - Sun -Question of the Day...

To Comment on today's Question, Simply click on the word "Comments" below next to the number of comments and then, type in the white box!
Mr. Anatomy, 
I'm an African American woman living in (Not Gonna Say it) trying to navigate this maze we call life. I was in a long term relationship with a man I met in high school and we eventually married and had 2 children. Last year I lost my man to a Caucasian  woman and I have been extremely bitter about it every since. I am a professional attorney and I recently made partner at my firm. My ex husband and I are still friends and are great parents for our children. When I asked him why he left me for this lady, he said there are fundamental differences between dating black women and dating white women that frankly I would never understand. He has agreed to answer any questions my friends and I may have on your blog about those differences should the need arise. My girlfriend said she used your blog with success and suggested I bring my question to you as well. Understand, I am not trying to alienate any of your bloggers, I just thought this would  be a way to finally understand why black women are losing a battle for our "GOOD" brothers to women of different races. I hope we can have this discussion, without it getting too messy.  My question is......
"Why are black men now dating white women at an alarming rate? Can dating a different race truly be that different in the eyes of a man?"


Ma'am, my bloggers are, for the most part, very intellectual and candid individuals, so I feel this is a discussion we can have in an effort to answer your question. From hence forward, I will address you as Ms. Professional as a matter of respect and clarity. Please make yourself available for any questions my bloggers may have of you. You are officially our topic for our weekend symposium! 



Hurchel Williams, MBA
Life Coach, Motivational Relationship Speaker
Author, Anatomy of a Cheater 
Williamshjr@anatomyofacheater.com (send US your Questions anonymously) 
www.cafepress.com/anatomyofacheater (purchase OUR merchandise)
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