Dear Mr. Anatomy,
I met a man at church last Sunday. He is new in town and recently divorced. We stood outside of the church for an hour or so talking and getting acquainted before deciding to make a date for the movies later in the day. Mr. Anatomy, we have truly hit it off and although I have never believed in Love at First Sight, I am starting to make a believer out of myself. I am a woman of Christian virtue but I am not perfect. He seems genuine and just as much into me as I am into him. I guess my question is .........
Thanx for bringing your question to our forum. I have a little experience in meeting, greeting, and dating early and I will share my thoughts with you just as soon as my bloggers have had their time with you. I will address you as Ms. "LoveStruck" from hence forward and please remain available for any questions my bloggers may have of you.
Hurchel Williams, MBA
Life Coach, Motivational Relationship Speaker
Author, Anatomy of a Cheater
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Hell NO.....This is not a fairy tale. I'm sure u have some friends, aunts, cousins, or somebody that has plenty of stories about how this works. In the beginning it's new and problem free. From a mans point of view we do everything right. We r on our best behavior. We open doors, rub feet, talk and listen, buy flowers.....all that good shit till we start fucking. Then the shit hits the fan. Now I'm only speaking for sm men not all because my momma taught me don't start nothing I can't keep up. But everybody's not taught that away. All imma say is don't start planning a wedding too soon
ReplyDeleteEvery girl i ever loved i knew it was love at first sight. Been married twice now! lol You do the math
ReplyDeleteDon't get me wrong some people have success but all that glitters is not gold and time will tell. Have fun. Remember, you're meeting his REPRESENTATIVE right now. Get to know him
ReplyDeleteyou are thinking too far into this... you know nothing about this man. and further more he doesn't know you either. evaluate your affections once you truely get to know each other. until then keep it simple. better yet, always keep it simple
ReplyDeleteGo for it!! But Take it slow..and remember the three month rule with the cookie!!
ReplyDeleteYes. My wife and I experienced Love AFS. I mean instant "Hallelujah chorus" and fireworks. However, it would be a great disservice for me to leave out the fact that some believe trust has to grow over time and trials. I wonder if only time and trials will tell you if it was really LAFS? One doesn't really know about the other person. It could just be Lust AFS or Fantasy AFS. One can have LAFS but the other FAFS. Either way, you KNOW yourself, if you're experiencing LAFS. But it can be hard for a person to believe something exists if he or she never experiences it. Caution: Always guard your heart in a LAFS situation (until the wedding night). My wife and I still have each others' hearts 12 years after our LAFS encounter.
ReplyDeleteI dont believe in love at first sight human nature is too complicated to decipher. I believe you are describing lust at first sight. Being a Christian woman does not prevent you from having this emotion. I also believe that church is the worse place to meet a candidate for courtship. You are not meeting the real person. You are meeting a fascade. They have on their best clothing. Best attitude. Best shoes. Best personality. I think that you should enjoy it for what it is good conversation, good company, and good times. Dont plan the wedding yet. Enjoy the journey of getting to know this man. He may have baggage that is well tucked under his Sunday best suit.
ReplyDeleteI believe in attraction at first sight, like of similar interests at first sight, a sense of intrigue and desire to learn more of a person. IBUT true love grows over time with knowledge and sharing. f you have been praying for God to place the right man in your path,whose to say this isn't him? Continue to be who you are and seek to learn more about each other and God will show you both if your paths crossing is meant to become one road or just an intersection.
ReplyDeleteIn an effort to be totally honest, Mr. Anatomy, I caught your show with Mackmoma last Sunday and this was right after I had met him, gone to the movies, and made it back in. Well, you said something that was very important, when you gave your reference between white women vs black women and them knowing what they want immediately after meeting a man. Well, in the past, I would have never decided to have intercourse with him as quickly as I have, but I must report, to get an honest opinion, we have already had sex, and we still continue to grow. Sorry Thedra, but 90 days wasn't gonna work. Michael, your story gives me hope and confidence this could work. Janelle, I have trust in my savior and I know I have been praying for a good man, could this possibly be him. He seems to think so too.
ReplyDeleteLovestruck
I think you should pick out your dress, location, and colors for the wedding...Only IF the Lord has spoken to you. The key is...has he spoken to the guy and your pastor, too? The Bible doesn't say SHE who findeth a husband, findeth a good thing. It says, HE who findeth a WIFE fideth a good thing. So, whatever the Lord Jesus tells you TRUMPS everybody and everything. Since you're a Christian, I'm sure you hear His voice. If we can talk you in or out of it, the it's not love.
ReplyDeleteWell. if You believe in Love at First Site then it's possible! Not Gonna be a Hater. Men act good in the beginning ,but Women act good in the beginning also? She cooks ,dresses nice ,keeps her hair done , possibly have sex with you anywhere . Will give you head without asking?Just cause she wants too in the car,may stop by the Job or whatever but if will go down good like a man likes it . But in this Particular case you need to be aware of the "New Nigga in Town Factor? Gonna keep it 100 with you. If he is the New Man in town. Then you need to watchout? The new nigga is getting more attention than you think? When you are the guy , all the Women are Curious about you.
ReplyDeleteLil Momma, looka here, stop thinkin and do wat chu did to brang him close. how old is you? i mean yu had a bunch of menz in yo life? yu been married bfor? all of dat can help yu mak a desicion. I'm wit Leslie, keep dat shit real simple, onlee time gon let chu kno if dis is right. I been wit my shawty for 14 years on an off and had one up afta many downs but we stil gud for eachother. I'm cuban and she american indian and purto rican but even wit our differenc we me it werk.
ReplyDeleteTha Don n Miami
Follow your heart and it will lead you in the right direction. Close out all of the outside noise. Mr. Anatomy, how did you get the moving picture of Sheneneah from the Martin's Show to be on your blog and move like it is? This blog is hilariously accurate and funny.
ReplyDeleteLisa P. from Oregon
I do not believe in love at first Sight. I have never met a man at first sight I wanted to spend my life with. My opinion is you are rushing things. Take it slow. Get to know the man first. I been married 1 year. Been in a relationship with him for 10 years. I still don't know everything about him. It took me a couple if years to realize that's my future. Take it slow.
ReplyDeleteYou can forget about this "church man " marrying you hunnie, he did what many have and still do. He showed you his Holy "ness " wooed you out them panties and now I guarantee he thinking of his escape route now. If he aint showed you an action plan towards marriage why the hell you got one?? Slow ya roll and use yo head now since you let yo coochie lead the first time. Stop screwing and see how his attitude change!!! Be careful, protect yoself and put the damn wedding dress back in lay away!!!!
ReplyDeleteSherita aka Madea
I think it's possible but looks can be decieving. you gotta remember a person will own show you what they want you to see. ask questions and really get to know him after all if you wanna live the rest of your life with him whats the rush take time to let your relationship grow. you met him at church so thats the perfect place to pray about your situation. although we can give your our opinion the choice is yours. but pray ask the lord is this man the blessing you promised me. keep your guard up because the biggest devils are in church. reflect on your past relationships and be honest admit what you did wrong and what he did wrong. now you might say i did everything right. but if that's the case you gotta figure out why it still didn't workout and why you hadnt noticed the signs. but take your past relationships and make those correct changes and hopefully it will last forever. but you must have communication and be sure he is into you as much as you are into him
ReplyDeleteI have no experience with this specific story. But, I would say let it flow and see where it goes. Don't begin to walk down the isle just yet, but roll and play with it and see where it goes. Take the time to see if you both feel the same way. I learned time that thinking he is the right one has not meant he was the right one for eternity, but rather that season. But, don't down play it etheir. You never know what God will send your way. Have fun for what ever it is. Enjoy! Will send a prayer up for you though.
ReplyDeleteTruth! Most men are thinking "Chicken Dinner" while most women are feeling the chemical reaction of a potential relationship. Please, please take it slow...give it six (6) month's before you even consider kissing. I know it sounds old fashion but if it's real it will endure the time of getting to really know one another. Consider why his last marriage ended in divorce - ask the tough questions and don't be gullible or desperate. Be careful in following your heart but rather lead it by God's Word. Shalom!
ReplyDeleteDear Ms. Lovestruck,
ReplyDeleteI have read everyone's post and reaction to your question and I am quite encouraged to know there is still a chance at love if we live right and keep our eyes on the prize. For me, I left traditions behind long ago and replaced those thoughts of old with my own judgement via my faith. If I meet someone and I feel instant chemistry with them, so be it. I am a firm believer of meeting someone and knowing exactly what YOU want from them when you meet. However, the question is your discernment for what they are feeling. Yes, they put their best foot forward, and everything else they show but shortly afterwards they return to normal and then you make your decision based on their normality. Be cautious, but be readily available for what's to come. You are both adults, and you know what I say, Adults do what Adults want to Do.
Mr. Anatomy = Hurchel Williams, MBA