Mr. Anatomy,
I have fallen for someone that should be totally off limits and I don't know how to proceed from here. My co-worker and I have been acquaintances for about 2 months and just because I am close to her, I have figured out a lot about her life. She has several men she's active with besides the one she calls her man. She is abusive to her boyfriend and treats him like he's completely a non factor. I've began to spend time with them in groups of people and sometimes even as a third wheel for drinks. He is very intellectual and I have grown very fond of him. He and I talk when she leaves to text others or take private phone calls but we haven't crossed the line. I think we have a mutual respect for one another and communicate with our eyes when we are not talking to one another. My Question is ......
"Is there any proper way to approach my co-worker and ask her if I can pursue something with the man she treats like crap? I know it's not right, and I've never done anything like this, but I enjoy the energy we share! Help Mr. Anatomy!!!"
Honestly, anything is possible, but before I give you my opinion, lets do this. First, I will address you as Ms. "Secret" from hence forward, secondly, I will allow my bloggers to give you their opinion before I render mine. Last, please make yourself available for the next 3 days to answer any question my bloggers may have. Let the fun begin.
Hurchel Williams, MBA
Life Coach, Motivational Relationship Speaker
Author, Anatomy of a Cheater
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Dea Lovingmemore Paige For the sake of the harmony on your job please dont play in this woman's yard. This will only make your work environment uncomfortable. She will talk about you going after her man and co workers will take sides. Too messy to even entertain. She sounds rachet and probably views her man as an object rather than a human being. It is natural for a woman to want to rescue someone that is being hurt. But you have to remember this is a grown ass man that is allowing himself to be treated this way. Something in his makeup is telling him that this is acceptable and you cannot fix it. Only he can. I would only be his friend. Now once he steals his balls out of her purse when she goes to sleep and run away to discover his manhold, spent some time with himself, and I no longer worked with this woman, then and only then would I develop more than a friendship with him.
ReplyDeleteDea summed that one up!!! Stear clear or suffer her wrath!!
ReplyDeleteIn life, sometimes you have to go for what you know. I know she works with you but you should probably have a feel for if she really likes him or not. You probably kinda know which guy she like more than the other. It will probably be a hard discussion, but start by asking her about her feelings toward him, and see if you can work in a conversation about if there is a true future for the two of them.
ReplyDeleteDear Ms. Secret,
ReplyDeleteThis is certainly a tricky situation to be in. Life tells us there will be no success if you pursue a union that is built by liking someone who most deem off limits. However, in the world of Mr. Anatomy, there are never situations that can't be maneuvered, one must remember to communicate and proceed with caution. If you truly feel in your heart this is something you would like to pursue, begin by speaking with your co-worker and let her know your true feelings. Sneaking to pursue him will only lead to disaster, however, you have to find out what her intentions are for that relationship and then draw your own conclusion. Now, chances are she may not release her feelings from him, but at least everything will be done above board. For me, communication is always key to a clearer understanding. "Seek before you Sneak" is my model! I sure hope this helps and outlines a clear path to where you would like this to go. Thanks for sharing in our forum.
Mr. Anatomy = Hurchel Williams, MBA
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