Mr. Anatomy,
Since I have been a dedicated blogger since the very beginning of your successful "blog launch" can I please move to the front of the Question line .......(smiling big)! OK.... here we go.... So my guy and I are considering a threesome. He has a female in mind but oddly enough, I would feel more comfortable if I could invite another man and make it a foursome. (No guy on guy action though!) My Question is .....
"How do I approach my guy with my new idea for our endeavor to make me more comfortable?"
Hurchel Williams, MBA
Life Coach, Motivational Relationship Speaker
Author, Anatomy of a Cheater
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Thank you! I'm ready to chime when questioned...
ReplyDeleteMa'am I'm glad that you and yours is comfortable enough to try this new "endeavor" but while y'all were talking about a three some with another women you should have threw out the idea of a three some with another man involve to see how he reacts to that. Now although we as men may have fantasies about our women sleeping with other man its another thing to have it happen. Now as for having a four some, that's alot of people in the room at one time. Also how's the other women gonna feel about a strange man in this mix. I think before y'all get the ball to rolling y'all need to go back to the drawing board on this one.
ReplyDeleteI noticed you said he has a female in mind, well you should check to make sure that they aren't already sleeping together because how is he planning to approach her with this and what makes him think she will agree to this......... as far as you wanting to invite another man make that a deciding stipulation of the whole deal in the mean time these situations normally work in the beginning but the aftermath can be crucial BROKEN MARRIAGES AND FRIENDSHIPS
ReplyDeleteYou need to find a COUPLE that is willing ....!
ReplyDeleteSS - Memphis !
Raymond... 1st things first. It's only a lot of people if someone is not being pleased while also staying in their lane.:) Now as for her she is a supreme closet freak with an agenda to be involved with me at any cost. We are all adults and speak our minds to the fullest, boundaries will be set. All parties involved are ready by interested is this adventure
ReplyDeleteMonique, We all have a mutual understanding she told him that she wants me with his approval because yes they were friends prior to me. They did hook up a few times but before me, but once we became monogamous no one has strayed. We're engaged and definitely all for fulfilling each others fantasies without going behind each others backs. We're most certainly considering aftermath emotions before we act.
ReplyDeleteAnonymous, the male and female that we have chosen are both single, but maybe after this they will consider being a couple. We are all extremely fit and attractive people...We could seriously make millions if we sold footage...lol
ReplyDeleteWell I guess its bout to be some panties dropping!!! Seriously if everyone understands the deal and all involved parties agree go ahead get your freak on!
ReplyDeleteMs. Seduction, my husband and I did the exact same thing you are proposing. We first started with someone he knew and she had expressed interest in being with me. Well, like you, I was a bit skeptical to what I would be doing while they were engaged with one another so I requested a friend be brought a long. Let me tell you, my husband and the other lady, when they got together, it was major fireworks and I was left with ole quick draw. Although the lady and I interacted towards the end, I was left feeling empty and saying to myself, "the build up was much stronger than the bite!" Secretly, after that was over, the lady and I met separately to explore the chemistry we shared. It was fun for a few times but eventually burned out as well. Ole quick draw tried coming around when my husband and I divorced but my memory of him was, well, rather Quick, so I adamantly declined his offer. I said to him, you had 1 time to make that impression and you failed. Of course he said, "I was nervous because there were so many people in one room!" All I say is Be Prepared for whatever comes afterwards and make sure you lay ground rules. I didn't want my husband kissing seductively and when I would sneak a peek and they were, it bugged me to NO end! So, make sure you express the do's and don'ts of this prior to! Have Fun. Are you planning on working the other lady over? Oh, one more thing, I couldn't help but feel my hubby and she had been together before, the chemistry was just too good!
ReplyDeleteHey Babygal, lemme get in on dis here. Ok, da girl, she a friend of ya man right? Tha dood, is he ya man friend oh yo friend? Has he eva gotten yo booty befor? If so, do ya man kno? See whatchun hav to do is tel everythang on tha front en d. If ya don't then people get hurt. sex in groups is fun but dont mess up what yu got for a danc with other partnas. I wil be honest withchu, i did this wit my ole lady and she and tha man kept hookin up lATER. I got mad but I rememberd I did this, I brought it to her so, I bit tha bullet and startd freakin the other lady. We were drankin and shit, evrbody was adult so aint no secrets. Tak it from me, if yu love him, talk everthing out cause sometimes dem girls that want you, want yo man and what he doin for you. they use that 3some shit to get in and they puddi poo to stay in. I'mma ole playa, been doin this shit for a bit, sex ruin shit sumtimes.
ReplyDeleteTha Don N Miami
If you gonna do this, you just need to say, "baby, let's just go all the way with this thang and make it unforgettable. If we gonna do it, let's do it big or not at all. Let's both have our cake and eat it toooooo !" LOL
ReplyDeleteSS - Memphis
White Chocolate & The Don,
ReplyDeleteI really appreciate you both for sharing the outcomes of your decisions. We each love hard when it comes to each other and want to please each other immensely in every way. Initially, he asked me for a threesome with this friend longtime friend because he knows she is discreet, reserved and he can trust her and myself to the fullest. Though, she puzzles me because she talked me and reassured me that though they messed around in the past out of being single and convenient they never had relationship sparks and we're never a couple. She says that she knows he truly loves me because he has never seen do for a female like he does for me and knows that he is finally in love. She says she is just down for helping her home bring his 3some fantasy to reality and it's a plus because she is attracted to me and wants to please me and leave us to live happily ever after unless we need her services again... Wild huh? Lol
As for the additional longtime guy friend of mine we have also been respectively cool of each others significant others but have never had intercourse with each other because we both usually involved, but we make no secret amongst us two that we both knock the brakes off of each other when given the unattached possibility but he also knows that I have found my Mr. Right but trust him to partake in some freaky fun with us...no man on man interaction or touching though...lol He will. Solely be their to make sure that the playing field is heterosexually even and keep my sanity if my guy decides to get too greedy.
ReplyDeleteOk, last comment; Make sure this what you want to do. I did it with my ex and his wife just because I wanted to try a 3some. I never had sex with him again after the 3some. And yes she knew he had been cheating on her the whole time they were married. It can work out both ways, just be absolutely sure you can handle the end result.... Have fun!
ReplyDeleteSS - Memphis
Anonymous #2 My guy and I have so many rules were probably better off getting some viagra for both guys...just in case to avoid White chocolates' issue. We should go no holds bar and just agree to disagree and enjoy the experience vs holding grudges. It's just blissful inhibited sex....Right????! :) Love conquers all???
ReplyDeleteEven though you speak as though you have considered all sides to this I get the strong feeling that you are trying to convince yourself more than us. It does not matter what others think of your personal choices in life only you and if you are truily comfortable with them and the consequences that may follow. You reference that your preference is to have an orgy(more than 3 people sexually) rather than a men a trois (consisting of 3 people sexually.) It would seem that if you all have talked about exploring the possibilites of this escapades, why would you be reluctant to express your desire for an orgy?
ReplyDeleteFor the most part every woman that I know that have participated in these type of sexual tryst they all have said some things that sound the same:
1. it was fun at first but afterwards I felt things would never be the same with us again
2. either he was more into it than he first stated which led to the discovery that he was cheating
3. either she enjoyed it more than she thought she would and ended up leaving him for better pastures
In all cases it has led to the demise of the initial relationship. So my question to you is Are you asking because your gut tells you that while you are trying to satisfy this fantasy your gut is telling you that the relationship is on rocky grounds and may be running its course?
Dear Ms. Seduction,
ReplyDeleteI appreciate the courage you have to bring your question to our forum because understanding prior to action is always the best direction to take. Based on your responses to our blogger's questions, it seems you have considered most of the ramifications and different scenarios that may come of this interaction with others in your bedroom. My question is simple, is this your first time venturing into the "deep water" through your thoughts and actions? To answer your original question first, you tell your "GUY" exactly how you feel and why you think you want another participant. Make him understand your view and together, try to feel comfortable about the next step long before extending an invitation to the person you are thinking of inviting. All parties in this scenario are Adults, and because this is the case, be sure to consider the basic aspect of what you haven't explored, the translation of true action through sight! Try to think really hard about what you are about to see and how you'll process this internally. If after pondering this, you feel you can handle the outcome, take Mr. Anatomy's slogan and make it your own: Adults do what Adults want to Do! I hope this has helped. I'll await your answer to my 1 question before I render my final thought.
Mr. Anatomy = Hurchel Williams, MBA
Mr. Anatomy
ReplyDeleteYes, this is not the first time that I've communicated my thoughts to a significant other about additional partners in the bedroom but it is the 1st time that I've wanted to act on my on thoughts because I know that I've found finally right man to do it with And the right pleasure seekers. I feel safe mentally and physically with this man regardless of the outcome.
I meant no, this is not the first time that I've expressed my thoughts...but this will be the first time I actually on them. Mr. Anatomy : )
ReplyDeleteDear Ms. Seduction,
ReplyDeleteSince this is the first time you are acting out your fantasy, I caution you to what your eyes will see and your mind will process. Granted, this is something I am sure you have carefully thought of and expressed, but be sure and point out what the "deal breakers" are and also implement a safe "STOP" word for the session. If its Pineapple, as was the case with Kevin Hart, or some other word, just make sure when it is stated, all actions cease! Everyone has things in their life they want to achieve, I applaud you for taking you and your partner's ideas of intimacy to another level. Be careful, and be Safe, life will never be the same in your bedroom! (smile)
Mr. Anatomy = Hurchel Williams, MBA
Thank you so much Mr. Anatomy. My man and I have surely conjured up all of the possibilities of how this encounter can bring joy with pain all at the same time. By nature I'm one of those people that manage to think too hard, which causes me to miss out on joyful experiences but also saves me potential heartache. So with that said, we will continue to ponder on the possibilities and if we actually follow through I will be back give you all the scoop on the outcome. Thanks you friends for your questions / input and shared experiences that have definitely turned our fantasy into reality and how raw real can be.
ReplyDeleteHow will you feel watching your man penetrate another lady? Mr. Anatomy said it best, your eyes don't lie. Sex in the name of fun is fabulous, but when it's with someone you love in a plus one type setting, shit gets sticky. Tell you man, keep it moving and don't be too intimate, I am telling you from experience, your emotions will f*%k you up. Sista, watcha self! Tell him to use positions that are not intimate to the two of you. Everything away from his face. It makes a difference. Has he ever done this before?
ReplyDeleteMathew,
ReplyDeleteExactly! Can we say steam producing from my ears, that's where the other man comes in for her. We will definitely have a playbook arrangements and meeting of the minds prior to the "game"...IF it happens. I can say this, if my guy wants a free for all with her then he will have to understand that I get to try the new horse in the stable as well. Fair is fair. :)
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ReplyDeleteMs. Seduction, you seem like you got everything in order. I must say in the past, I would have been right there with you but now my life has changed significantly. You see, I am a gay man and while I was married, living the life of a heterosexual man, things changed drastically for me when my wife of several years told me she didn't desire me in bed anymore. Go look at Feb, 10 on Mr. Anatomy of a cheater's blog, my sister outed me there. I use to date men and women here in Atlanta but now I have decided just to date men exclusively. I am in a monogamous relationship and to date things are going good. Unless you have sex with your heart, I wouldn't have been much help anyway. My wife told me as she was leaving, IT IS THE SIZE of the SHIP !!!!
ReplyDeleteOh my! Matthew, Matthew, Matthew,
DeleteI respect your honesty. It sounds like you've been through the ringer. I hope life gives you a partner that makes you happy and appreciates your "ship."
That's peace, Mr. Matthew : )
DeleteMs. Seduction, I'm fine, everything is what it is. Atlanta was so much more progressive than Texas and I have started over with someone who knows what it means to love and protect you from the evils that lurk. My partners loves what we do rather pitching or catching, my ship is just fine for sailing!
ReplyDelete