What's Wrong with My Marriage ..... Question of the DAY .....

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Dear Mr. Anatomy,
I have followed you for years and now it seems I am the one needing some guidance. My husband and I have been together for 20 years, and married for 13. Needless to say, we are empty nesters now, as all the kids are off to college and pursuing their own lives. My problem, I have done EVERYTHING I know how to do to keep my relationship interesting, but my husband has a tendency to stay out all night, when he feels like it. I call, no answer, I text, no answer, and he strolls in the next day at daybreak! Sure, I get the excuses; "fell asleep drunk at a friend's house, blah blah blah," but I told him if he does it again, I am out of here. Well, the other night, he did it again! My question is ............
"How do I get my husband's attention and let him know, his antics are breaking me down internally and truly hurting our relationship!"


Ma'am, thank you for allowing my panel of experts and I to tackle your question. From hence forward, I will address you as "Sleepless Nights" and get the opinions of my bloggers before I weigh in and give my advice. Please remember to stay available to answer any questions my bloggers may have for you.








Hurchel Williams, MBA
Life Coach, Motivational Relationship Speaker
Author, Anatomy of a Cheater

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My Life, Marriage, and Our Struggle! ~ Comments of the week!

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*Since we are always answering questions for the betterment of others, I decided to this time, shed some light on how "ALLOWING 3-SOMES" can go wrong in a relationship. I am going to allow one of "Our Own," attempt to share her story. Often she gives advice about the casualties of what can go wrong when you open the doors of your relationship to others, in this topic, this week, she has agreed to tell her story, and speak of it openly in our forum. A little background; before she was happily married to a man, she was involved for years exclusively with another woman. After getting married, she and her husband had an agreement that they would together, still see women in their life. This is her story ........! She will be the 1st Post. I will address her as "Mrs. Struggle!"
Please take a moment to read and understand this lady's story. This could easily be You or someone you Know.
-Mr. Anatomy-

Hurchel Williams, MBA
Life Coach, Motivational Relationship Speaker
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What's Wrong With Me ????? Our Question of the Day

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Dear Mr. Anatomy,
I am a regular, everyday guy, who has been married now for 3 years. This is my second marriage and I give my marriage all it deserves, and sometimes more; but I can't stop cheating! I know everybody and their momma will try to bash me, but I am seriously asking, from one cheater to another, why do we do what we do? I am not trying to open up old wounds with you, but you have publicly acknowledged your indescretions, so I ask you,

"What is your advice for a man who has a wonderful woman, but gets bored at home? Bored enough
to find others to make him feel good?"

Sir, your problem is not new but most people won't tackle it head on and give it the attention it needs. So, you have come to the right place. Without trying to downplay this, or make you feel worse than you probably do (evidence by outing yourself in a public forum) we will explore this with my bloggers and then, I will come back and offer my opinion and solution. You may be shocked at my approach!






Hurchel Williams, MBA
Life Coach, Motivational Relationship Speaker
Author, Anatomy of a Cheater

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"Am I a NORMAL Woman?" Our Question of the Day .......

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Dear Mr. Anatomy,
I have struggled within myself for a few years about something I do in my alone time. I have been happily married for 8 years, and been with my husband for a total of 10. Our life is normal and I think, very rewarding. We have 2 children and are an all American type family, I guess. But, I spend a lot of time pleasuring myself. My husband loves me, and there has never been any infidelity on either side. I just don't get the pleasure I once did from my husband, so I find myself looking for breaks in my schedule to take care of myself. The other day after being with my huband, I rushed to the bathroom to finish and when I opened my eyes, he was standing there. He shook his head, and simply walked away. Damn, I thought he was fast asleep, like always. My question is ..............
"Is wanting to be alone with yourself a common thing? I never deny him, but my enjoyment comes from me, and me only when it comes to sex."

Ma'am, I have chosen your question because this is one I have touched on many times in my seminars but never here in my public forum. I do have an answer for you, but not until after my bloggers have had a chance to weigh in on this discussion. From hence forward, I will refer to you as Ms. "I LOVE ME." Please remain available as instructed in my email to you for any questions my bloggers may have of you.

Hurchel Williams, MBA
Life Coach, Motivational Relationship Speaker
Author, Anatomy of a Cheater

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"IT Finally Happened to Me"..... Our Question of the Day ...?

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Dear Mr. Anatomy,
In 2012, I heard you speak for a group of professors at (Not gonna Say It) at (Not gonna say it) University. You gave a very high percentage of men cheating and at that time I questioned your numbers because I thought "It could NEVER happen to me!" Well, It did!!! My husband and I work out a lot at the gym. We are both pretty athletic, but he started going to the gym more in the afternoons after work, which is not our normal time. I didn't think anything of it, because I trust him deeply. Well, a few days ago, I was contacted by the other woman and she informed me she and my husband have been seeing each other for over 6 months and she has even been in my house. They met at the gym, and she was told that things at my house are not good because he's not happy and was asked to give him time to straighten things out. (As she put it) so they can be together. Well, that is certainly news to me! When I questioned him, he said yes, he knows her and yes they have been together, but the facts are a little more detailed. He said we would talk when he got back in town next Monday, and shut me down because he is away on a major business trip. My question is,

"Can a marriage survive cheating and infidelity? If so, how do we get back on the right track?"

Ma'am, thank you for allowing my bloggers and I to tackle this question for you. Yes, I remember that seminar and I appreciate you coming to me after initially doubting my researched numbers. I will allow my bloggers to address your question prior to giving you my take on it. From hence forward, I will address you as Mrs. "Doubtfire." Please remain available for any questions my bloggers may have for you.

Hurchel Williams, MBA
Life Coach, Motivational Relationship Speaker
Author, Anatomy of a Cheater

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"Sugar Daddy and his Princess" Our Question of the Day?

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Dear Mr. Anatomy,
I have quite the dilemma. I am dating a much older man and I truly enjoy being with him, but I am ashamed to take him around my friends. I know that sounds bad, and I must apologize but the fact still remains that my man is 18 years older than me. I'm 27 and he is 45. In the beginning, 6 years ago, he was this mature guy that had it all together; Great sex, great body, and super smart, but as he has crossed into his mid 40's, things are starting to beef up. While sex is still okay, it's routine, less frequent, and he is acting more his age and less like the firecracker I met when I was 21. He's been acting really insecure lately and just showing up at functions and places where I normally go alone.  While I love the security he offers, I never thought the day would come where I am truly ashamed of him. Yesterday, he mentioned marriage and I said to myself, "I have to do something before it goes too far!" My question is .......

"How do you break it off with someone you truly love but KNOW you can't spend the rest of your life with?"

Ma'am, your question is quite unique in nature and I will give you the opinion you seek. However, prior to my answer, I will allow my bloggers to give you their opinion. I will address you as Ms. "Young Thang" from hence forward. Like my email to you stated, please remain available for any questions my bloggers may have of you. :)

Hurchel Williams, MBA
Life Coach, Motivational Relationship Speaker
Author, Anatomy of a Cheater

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"Is Cheating Ever the Answer," Our Question of the Week

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Dear Mr. Anatomy,
I am a married mother of two wonderful children. I am in my mid 30's and life seems to have come to a screeching halt. My husband and I are so routine, it's like our life is on a calendar. Don't get me wrong, things are great; nice home, cars, church and all the normal signs of success for an outsider looking in but my life seems boring! I have discussed this fact with my husband regularly, but he tells me to "get over it" I am just having an early mid-life crisis. I am a hotel manager, and my daily duties are just as routine as my home life. There just has to be fun somewhere that makes me feel alive again! My question is for you and your female audience. I have read several of your previous questions and I feel I will get a straight answer here, with No-Fluff. Here it goes .......

"Is an affair ever good to revive a person mentally, physically, or even just to make them feel alive
again?"

 
Ma'am, what you are feeling is natural, but unlike your husband, I won't go so far as to call it a mid-life crisis in your 30's. However, I will give you my spin on it but not before I allow, as you requested, my bloggers to take a crack at it. I will address you as "Ms. Perplexed" from hence forward. Please remain available for any questions my bloggers may have for you.

Hurchel Williams, MBA
Life Coach, Motivational Relationship Speaker

Author, Anatomy of a Cheater
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A "Thug" and a "Gentleman" ...Our Question of the Week..??

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Dear Mr. Anatomy,
I noticed you don't do your blog as much as you use too but unlike most, I got a serious delimma over here! (smile) I'm kinda dating two guys at the same time. One is a "thug-type" who is sexing me beyond belief. He and I have been friends since high school but nobody truly know that we are more than just friends. He is my handyman around the house, and I rent the other side of his duplex that he owns. Our secret is, he comes over here late at night, to fix more than the pipes. Now, with that said, I have a boyfriend that I truly love and he finances my life to an extent. We have been dating for 2 years, and are on the verge of marriage. On the outside, I am trusted, loving, and a career woman, but my gentleman doesn't do it for me sexually because, he can't fix me like my thug, and he can't "Drill" like him. He surely is not tattooted up with the Timberlands and tank tops either;  My question .....

"Is what I'm going through really that unusual? Will I be able to walk away from my "thug" when my
boyfriend pop's the question? "Why or Why Not?"

Ma'am, it has been awhile but we are always here for our bloggers and fanz. I apologize for the absence, but Mr. Anatomy has alot of fires burning but your topic caught my attention so, YES, I will take your question. From hence forward, I will address you as Ms. "Thug Luv" and allow my bloggers to give you their take before I show back up to give you mine. Please remain present for any questions they may have of you.

Hurchel Williams, MBA
Life Coach, Motivational Relationship Speaker

Author, Anatomy of a Cheater
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Confused by my OWN addiction to Sex..... Our Question of the Day...?

Dear Mr. Anatomy,
I have a girlfriend whom I live with. She has one child, he is 8 yrs old. We have been together now for 2 1/2 yrs and she is recently divorced. She has been married twice before. I have never been married. Truth is, I am a sex addict. Every woman I see I visualize sex with them and how it would be..yay or nay. I want to settle down with my girl but something inside me is too lustful. It's like being single, I can't get anyone to mess with, but as soon as I get a girl, I get all this attention. It's like I can't say no. It's hard to find a woman who is a sex addict/freak like me. I seriously want it all the time and I seem to have a more fulfilling sex life when I mess with other women. I know cheating..is wrong but man it's so hard when your woman can't give you certain aspects of sex all that good but she balances it out by being a good woman to you. I know she is trying to get over her 10 yr marriage from her past, but in between time I'm finding my own muse;SEX. I guess my question is:

"Is there anybody out there who feels the same. Does anyone out there have a sex problem where you are horny all the time, but your significant other is not doing the job? HELP"

Sir, I don't claim to be an expert who legitimately deals with addition as you have professed, but I will allow my bloggers to answer your question. From hence forward, I will address you as Mr. "Confused." Please remain availble for any questions my bloggers may have for you and I will give my take a bit later.


Hurchel Williams, MBA
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A Marriage of "NO Sex" Is there Help For Me? Our Question of the Day?

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Dear Mr. Anatomy, 

From the outside looking in my life appears to be desirable. I have a husband, young child, whom I stay home with, a house, I'm a student and I also run my own small business. The problem is my marriage. We have been married for 4 years, together for 6, BUT the last time we had sex or any physical contact was on our wedding night when we conceived our child! Everything has fallen apart and now we can rarely hold a conversation without a fight. There has been another man whom I've dated, but due to busy schedules and sheer distance we mainly talk via phone and email. I haven't seen the other man in months. I'm questioning my marriage, I have gone to see an attorney but have not filed for divorce;Mainly because I'm scared to share my daughter and I have almost nothing because my husband is the main source of income in our house. My husband does not know about the other man but I feel like if I want my marriage to work then I can't lie. But if I tell him he will leave me immediately because he has made that very clear. I don't want the whole world knowing there was someone else but he would tell everyone including my parents. My Question is .......

"What do I do; do I tell my husband about the other man or not? That is not the reason my marriage is horrible."

In life, nothing ever works out the way we plan. I will attempt to help you through your dilemma but not before my bloggers give you their insight. From hence forward, I will address you as Ms. "Sexless". Please remain available for any questions my bloggers may have. Your ride starts NOW........!

Hurchel Williams, MBA
Life Coach, Motivational Relationship Speaker

Author, Anatomy of a Cheater

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Am I Asking Too Much to have a Good Man? Question of the Day?

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Dear Mr. Anatomy,
Ok given I'm not the perfect woman! I can turn a few heads, cook great meals, work multiple jobs, God-fearing, carry myself in a respectful manner, and of course I could go on and on. As I single woman I meet guys regularly but unfortunately I'm rarely attracted to any of them and no I'm not attracted to females. I simply want a manly man; you know the type that our grandmother's mother married. Chivalry was naturally a quality. The ones that take out trash everyday, fix things when they see something wrong, go to church with you, cook for you, rub your feet, surprise you with a "I love u card;" all because they really do! He holds your hand while he drives, send flowers because your day went bad or going great; dammit things that make you feel like a complete WOMAN at all times. I can reassure you I will be the most dedicated, submissive and qualified woman for that man that honestly acts like one. Until then should I limit my expectations or give up and settle for the immature boy that appears to be "mr perfect" because he is dressed nice or as these amateurs would say, "has swag." My Question is .....
"Do I need to lower my standards? Am I asking for too much?"

Ma'am.... our goal at Anatomy of a Cheater is to offer the best information available from people just like you who have experienced and learned! From hence forward, I will address you as Ms. Perfection. Please remain available to answer any questions my bloggers may have of you. After the bloggers, I will give you my Opinion!







Hurchel Williams, MBA
Life Coach, Motivational Relationship Speaker

Author, Anatomy of a Cheater

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And YOU wonder why We do what We do .... Question of the Day?

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Mr. Anatomy,

I come to you with a heavy heart because in life, you always want to feel you have change inside of you. My story; I went away on a white collar crime for the duration of about 18 months. While away, I did some soul searching and had a long walk with myself about my past transgressions with women. I am a "Preacher's Kid" that always found joy in the pleasure of not just one woman, but the honesty in dating multiples. After my short stint away, I decided I would have a new lease on life, find one woman, and make her my world. As advertised, I did just that. Got a great job, worked my way up the ladder, and asked a lady of my dreams to marry me and currently we are engaged. We have been dating for 2 years, but engaged for 1 and recently, my mindset took a left turn. I was asked to lead a team to open a new restaurant in the Midwest so I left my "Atl" roots for about a month, while I dug deep into my career. Fiance' and I had an understanding, as NOW, we actually live together under one roof. While I was away, it seems the "Cat" wanted to play. The other night, while assisting my heavily intoxicated fiance' into bed, I was a gent and plugged her phone up on charge for the evening. When I did, a message notification popped up from her (Lesbian) co-worker wishing her a good night. Well, I did what I had NEVER done before and dug a little deeper into previous text messages. Low and behold, one read, "Look at me talking to you like we have never "P-lucked" before! To which my lady answered, "Yes we did, and it was good, and YOU know it's yours to have again!" My first reaction was to awake my drunk fiance' and get to the bottom of this, but I sat there and stared at her for what seemed like an eternity! When I finally came to terms with this, and questioned her, she said, "I thought you would be Okay with it, shit, it was a girl!" And I thought, "yeah, a Butch, at that!" My question is ............

"Should I feel bad about awakening the sleeping GIANT in myself again? I tried it the right way, and it seems I was kicked in the nuts like a do-good-er!" I feel disrespected and Bitch-slapped! I am about to do me again!


Question Accepted.....You will now be referred to as "Mr. HURT!" Please remain available for any questions my bloggers may have of you! 
Hurchel Williams, MBA 
Life Coach, Motivational Relationship Speaker

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It wasn't Even About Me........Naughty or Nice! Question of the Day...

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Dear Mr. Anatomy,
I had an amazing weekend where your slogan, "Adults do what Adults want to do" came into play. I traveled out of town to work and do some training. Lately, my life has been a microcosm of one up and down after another. I am a young person who has had to grow up and be a woman in every sense of the word. My relationship, while less than perfect, is just that, my relationship and somewhere between I-Do, and playing housewife, I have lost the very essence of how a woman should feel. Today, I played sexy-bad-gurl and I feel wonderful about it. In the course of 24 hours, I was in bed with 2 different men, neither of which were my husband and for once in my life, I feel rejuvenated! One man was a co-worker from a different area, while the other was an important VIP I know from the community. The first may have been expected because of innocent flirting that finally blossomed into an evening, but the other took me by surprise because it wasn't supposed to happen with this stoic, poker faced individual......but was WONDERFUL on all accounts. I guess my question is,

"Should a person ever have to make excuses for what happens in their life? While I don't ever expect this weekend to be repeated. Is there a lesson to be learn from my walk on the wild side?"

Ma'am, as always, I would like to thank you for bringing your question to our forum. I have an answer for you, but not before my bloggers give you an intuitive spin on your question. From hence forward, I will address you as "Mrs. Attention" as we discuss this openly and look for an answers to your question.

Hurchel Williams, MBA 
Life Coach, Motivational Relationship Speaker

Author, Anatomy of a Cheater 
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He left me when I thought he LOVED me ..... Our Question of the Day...

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Dear Mr. Anatomy, 
My life is spiraling out of control and I need a helping hand from you and your followers. I have been dating the same guy for over 6 years. We have invested in each other's lives from the very beginning and  we continued to love and respect each other right up until we decided to get married. He asked me to marry him in front of my family and his and together, we've been planning a wedding since last summer. However, in December we had a big fight about money and our priorities for the future. While I didn't think it was that big of a deal, he cancelled our engagement and started spending time at his best friends house because he said he needed some space to sort through his feelings. I was still seeing him and having sex.  In January, seeing him regularly became seeing him early in the week, and not on weekends! Then, out of no where, I didn't see him for one whole week. I called and called, but got no answer. Then, last Saturday, he finally returned my call and said something that has caused me to cry everyday, and take a leave of absence from work, as I type this to you. This Mother^#*ker said I got drunk and got married in Vegas!! Bullshit, I said....... Mr. Anatomy, my question is......

"Are men truly that heartless and cruel to leave one relationship for another and get MARRIED? How do I move forward when I am in deep depression from the hurt and shame?"

Ma'am, I am so sorry this has happened to you, but I see this as a sign of the times in relationships. Before I give you my spin, I will allow my bloggers to crack this open and share their views. From hence forward, I will refer to you as "Ms. Heartbroken." Please remain available for any questions my followers my have for you. 

Hurchel Williams, MBA 

Life Coach, Motivational Relationship Speaker

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Should I Tell before He Does? ..... Our Question of the Day...

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Dear Mr. Anatomy,
As we all do, I have a past, and mine is a bit checkered. 5 years ago, I was up against hard times and I started to sell my services as an escort in the rather large city I live in. I had a select few clients and I was always safe and discreet with all that I did. I was a single woman, without children and I always went to remote places. I haven't done anything like that for about a year now because I have my stuff together, a new man, and a great new job. I told all my clients that I have retired, so to say, so please don't contact me. Well, the other night, while at a business function with my new boyfriend, he introduced me to his boss. When his boss turned to shake my hand, I and he instantly realized we knew one another from my escorting days. My expression said it all, and when my boyfriend asked, I blatantly lied because I didn't know what else to say. Since I knew this man intimately, I told my boyfriend I knew him from church vaguely, but didn't offer anymore information beyond that. Every since that night, I have had an uneasy feeling about lying to my boyfriend. We have been open and honest about "most" things in our relationship, but being and escort has been hidden very deep inside me! My Question is ......

"Should I come clean about my past? Or leave it buried where it is. I am a completely different woman, but if my boyfriend finds out, I want it to be from me!"

Ma'am, thank you for bringing you issue to our forum. I will give your question my full attention, but not until after my bloggers, and followers have had a chance to chime in. From hence forward, I will refer to you as "Ms. Escort." Please remain available for any questions my bloggers may have of you.

Hurchel Williams, MBA
Life Coach, Motivational Relationship Speaker

Author, Anatomy of a Cheater 
AskMrAnatomy@anatomyofacheater.com (send US your Questions anonymously) www.cafepress.com/anatomyofacheater (purchase OUR merchandise)www.anatomyofacheater.com (visit OUR website) http://twitter.com/anatomyofacheat (follow US on Twitter)https://www.facebook.com/anatomyofacheaterpage (like US on Facebook)

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Will the RING make things Change???? Our Question of the Day!

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Mr. Anatomy,
I didn't know if you were still accepting questions for your blog, but I am in need of your services in the worst way! I have been with my current boyfriend for about 3 years. Our relationship has been riddled with lies, deceit and some infidelity on both sides. I admit, I have stepped out too, but as a woman, I only ventured out because my boyfriend was not giving me the attention I needed. In the last year, however, we have both settled down and have gotten our relationship to a point where we both feel love has heeled our woes. But, Mr. Anatomy, yesterday, we went to the Obama Inauguration and at dinner last night, my boyfriend proposed to me in front of friends, family, and his work colleagues. I accepted but last night, while having sex, I couldn't help but stare at the ceiling and wonder, "is this really what I want?" I guess my question is ......

"After all this relationship has been through, will Marriage change our past and keep us moving in the right direction?"

Ma'am, I apologize, but I have been slacking heavily on my blog site due to heavy commitments in other areas of the "Anatomy Franchise" but my blog is what brought me the most notoriety so I will never totally abandon my roots. As for your question, I will allow my bloggers to take control and give you their opinion before offering my ideas at a later time. Please stay available for any questions my bloggers may have. We will address you as Ms. Engaged from hence forward.

Hurchel Williams, MBA
Life Coach, Motivational Relationship Speaker

Author, Anatomy of a Cheater 
AskMrAnatomy@anatomyofacheater.com (send US your Questions anonymously) www.cafepress.com/anatomyofacheater (purchase OUR merchandise)www.anatomyofacheater.com (visit OUR website) http://twitter.com/anatomyofacheat (follow US on Twitter)https://www.facebook.com/anatomyofacheaterpage (like US on Facebook)

Send Your Friend Request to: "Author Hurchel Williams (MrAnatomy)on Facebook.